I figured after Connor arrived that the next one wouldnt be far behind. Evan Bailey cried his first cry this morning, bright and early at 3:53am. He weighed in at 8 pounds, 9 ounces and 21 inches long. My good friend Emily went the Birth Center route and is already home resting. I will post a picture as soon as one comes my way. Happy Birthday Evan!
We have our first baby to arrive in The Year of The Baby. (which, I just realized, I am no longer a participant of…). Say hi to Connor! He said Hello World at 1:30pm yesterday. By the wonders of technology, we were all kept very up to date through labor and delivery. It amazes me that only a half hour after his birth, I got to see pictures of sweet Connor. You can read all about Kelli’s more than 12 hour labor here and you can see some great shots of Connor here, along with all the important stats. Hopefully I will get to meet him soon.
And next on the list is Emily’s baby boy Evan. Any day now!
UPDATE: Here’s a purplesabrina.com exclusive picture. You’ll only see it here, folks. One day old Connor, fully prepared for his first snowstorm.
Sorry I havent been posting much. Things are pretty blah around here on the baby front. However, yesterday I got two things in the mail that I wasnt expecting. One was a letter from the North Carolina Department of Health and Human Services, Division of Social Services. Yeah, they need to work on shortening their name. Anyway, it was a letter addressed to US Citizenship & Immigration Services (CIS) and I was getting a copy. Basically saying that they have received our homestudy, approve it, and certify that we meet the criteria of NC to adopt a baby. This letter is all part of the process for finishing up our government paperwork (I600). It reminded me that we are still on the path to a baby, even if it seems to be a little halted.
The other letter was from my agency. It was a six month evaluation. Which reminded me that we’ve been with our agency for six months. A few goals have been checked off, and we’re just hanging out on “Dossier is accepted by country of choice.” (for who knows how long). But it was nice to know that they had some sort of evaluation process for how things are going so far.
I’ve mailed in our application for one grant and am working on a few others. And, hopefully I’ll finish up my Dear Birthmother letter soon. We’ll see.
Next topic: Adoption Agencies.
First of all, YES, you need an adoption agency. There will be a point, when you start researching it all, that you will wonder… is an agency really necessary? Yes. They are. Trust me.
With that said, the only real advice I can give you on picking an agency is to go with your gut. I knew a few things off the bat. I wanted an agency that was local and I wanted them to be considerably small (as in not dealing with too many cases). That criteria really did narrow down the search for us, and we wound up with Carolina Adoption Services. (We didnt decide on a country until after picking our agency. If you do it the other way around, that might also narrow down your search). I will say that I’m pleased with our decision. CAS has been helpful, knowledgable, and caring. However, they dont make me say “You must go local!” or “Stay with a small agency!” While I dont have the experience of a larger, out of state agency to compare it to, I wasnt overwhelmed with the personal attention I secretly desired. (and I’m willing to admit that was a high expectation, which is why I’m not holding it against them).
So, here are some things to consider when trying to find the right agency for you.
1. Timeline. While Korea is my only experience, I’m sure other countries operate in a similar manner (with the exception of China). This manner is that several adoption agencies in Korea work with agencies in the states. And each Korean agency has its own timeline (by way of their standing with the Korean government). By pure luck, we wound up with SWS in Korea, which had the fastest running program, averaging 9 months. However, other agencies in Korea quote their average at 16-18 months. It baffles me to think that it could take twice as long, but thats the case. The best way to research this information is to find a reliable message board and ask. You’ll get answers from people in the thick of it, which I’ve found very helpful.
2. Money. Country fees remain the same across the board. So, what you’re really looking for is the agency fees. I think their charges, while it pains me to write such large checks, are reasonable. They do a lot of work, and they are providing a great service. I would probably spend twice as much money if I tried to do it on my own. But, that doesnt mean you shouldnt look for the best deal. More importantly than that for me, was knowing that a percentage of our agency’s budget went towards humanitarian efforts. Not only was my fee going towards my social workers paycheck, but it was also providing running water for an orphanage in Russia. I’m down with that.
3. Gut check. Above all else, its important that you feel your agency of choice has your best interest at heart. The hardest part of it all is trusting that they’ll take care of you. Cause really, (aside from God) the majority of it is in their hands. You need to feel like they’re capable and will be honest with you.
Would I pick CAS for our 2nd time around? Most likely. I may look into a couple of agencies that came to my attention long after the fact. But I would be a-okay with CAS representing us again.
